Hi! I'm Alison. I'm a comedian. I pay the bills by playing people on TV, in movies and online. I also write words and worry too much. I have an embarrassingly low level of fame where no one knows my name, but they have this feeling that they went to school with me. I like firm handshakes, information, my dog, smart people and the Earth. I'm on Parks and Rec sometimes and VH1 even more. I'm sorry if I once pranked you on MTV. But, c'mon! That was fun, right?
I did the Lady to Lady Podcast and it’s on iTunes now! Listen here.
This might blow your mind.
Stuff My Mother Taught Me
Here’s something in honor of upcoming Mothers Day.
My mom is pretty great. She’s very old-fashioned and probably couldn’t tell you who Rihanna is, but she knows how to use a sewing machine and bake banana bread from scratch.
Through the years, she’s taught me some nifty little tricks that come in handy when you’re just being a woman. But I’ve also collected my own stuff along the way, that I someday hope to pass on to my own daughter. So, here ya go.
The ODD numbers are my mom’s. The EVEN numbers are mine. But they’re all great. Ladies, please add as you see fit.
1. Wear a slip when you need one.
2. Two words: knee socks. (You’re welcome, dudes.)
3. You know those little perfume samples in magazines and catalogs? Every so often, tuck one into your lingerie drawer. Gives a nice, light girly scent.
4. Never bring paperwork into the bedroom. Except for a book.
5. Don’t let your bra show.
6. Let your bra show.
7. Know stories about your mom, your grandmothers, and your great grandmothers.
8. Girlfriends can be like family.
9. The most fragile part of a man is his ego.
10. When you wear something short and/or sexy, pair it with something more conservative.
11. It’s ok to believe in God.
12. It’s ok to believe in Love.
13. Always send a thank you note.
14. Nothing’s more impressive than a firm handshake from a lady.
15. Sit up straight.
16. Exercise is great for your soul, your butt, your mind, and your sex life.
17. Tradition is important.
18. Dry Shampoo. It gives you an extra day of not washing away that great blow out.
19. Prayer has healing powers.
20. Meditation has healing powers.
Happy Mothers Day!
Watch this new digital short I’m in!
I can’t. I just can’t. How is this not the most viewed video in the world???
Thinking of Boston.
(via fiftypercentoffcenter)
Guys…OMG you guys. New 7 Minutes In Heaven. With the heavenly angel Jon Hamm. You guys. OMG.
(Source: aboveaverage, via purns)
Is it weird that I saw this frog and thought: THAT’S THE COLOR PALETTE I WANT FOR MY LIVING ROOM?
(Source: lizardking90, via theanimalblog)
Another Xandra Dent photo teaser.
WATCH ME ON NEWSREADERS on Adult Swim THIS THURSDAY NIGHT at MIDNIGHT! And follow my character Xandra Dent on Twitter: @xandradent
- TV -
PARKS AND RECREATION on NBC
Shauna Malwae-Tweep keeps finding her way back to the Parks and Rec department. Thanks for watching!
THE LATE LATE SHOW
WITH CRAIG FERGUSON
on CBS!
It was so fun to be back as a guest on Ferguson! Click on this pic to watch my interview.
NEWSREADERS on ADULT SWIM
See why I'm dressed in these insane outfits on the Children's Hospital spinoff Newsreaders! Be sure to watch on March 14th!
Honored to be in two episodes of this groundbreaking show.
THE LATE LATE SHOW
WITH CRAIG FERGUSON
on CBS!
Thanks to the gang at Ferguson for having me back on the show for a second time! Click on this pic to watch the interview!
THE GOODWIN GAMES on FOX
Catch me soon on this new comedy from the creators of How I Met Your Mother.
- Online Shows -
Check out this VERY NSFW webshow from Rob Riggle! Click on the pic to watch.
DATING RULES
FROM MY FUTURE SELF
From the producers of Gossip Girl, "Dating Rules" is a beautiful show about a girl who receives text messages from herself, 10 years in the future. It's so fun to watch! (Click on the pic to check it out!)
MAYNE STREET on ESPN
The Emmy-nominated ESPN webseries Mayne Street is officially over. But click on this pic to watch our favorite episodes!
- PODCASTS -
YOU MADE IT WEIRD
I was a guest on "You Made It Weird," the Nerdist podcast from Pete Holmes. Click on the pic to listen. WE MAKE IT WEIRD!
Jordan, Jesse, GO!
I was a guest on the SUPER FAMOUS podcast "Jordan, Jesse, GO!" Click on the adorable racecar man to listen.
THE APPLE SISTERS PODCAST!
I was a guest on The Apple Sisters famous podcast! Buzz buzz buzz! Click on the pic to listen.
- LIVE SHOWS! -
DON'T TELL MY MOTHER
Thursday, Feb 28th at 7:30pm~ Check out this hilarious show full of stories that we REALLY don't want you to share with our moms! Star-studded cast! Click on the pic for show info! At Fais Do-Do!
UCB
Stay tuned for my next UCB show!
INDIGLO
Thanks for supporting our monthly alternative comedy show! After a great year of awesome guests, we are bringing the show to a close. Thanks for the laughs!
